Day 84: Twelve Weeks On...

Left Jaw Pain 0/10     

Right Jaw Pain: 0/10    

Hip Pain: 0/10

Inconvenience factor: 2/10

This week I have gotten a grip again! Thank goodness for that! You can all breathe out! 

 

How did I get to my place of zen? Lots of words of encouragement from friends and family! Then I spent a bit of time reading back over my blog to remind me of just how far I had come and in reflection, how far I had come in a really quite short period of time! I also focussed on the long term objective being 60 and chewing! 

It also greatly helped that the constant tingling in my chin and lip have stopped their ceaseless 'white noise' and now only tingle when I touch them! 

And the most exciting development is that my body has actually decided that it is okay for me to run again! This past week, I struck out on 2 tentative 20min jogs and felt just fine afterwards (albeit hot and buggared). Then yesterday, I headed to the Uni track and smashed out 4.5km! Definitely not easy but so seriously satisfying. It took hours to wipe the grin off of my face!

So largely, I am in a happy space again!

The only major embuggerance to my contentedness this week, has been the confounded elastics that still hold my teeth together in order to close my bite a bit! Seeing as I can open my mouth more and more every week and I am stuffing far more chewable food in there than ever before, the elastics keep breaking on me. At very unpredictable times and with great comedic effect!

When one pops, it sling shots inside my mouth, randomly snapping whichever lip, gum or inner cheek happens to be in the way. If it's a numb spot then it's all good....dodged a bullet, Tidy! If it hits an area with feeling - HOLEY MOLEY - it hurts like heck! 

At the moment, I am busting about 2-3 a day! It must be truly hilarious for the watcher when this happens in public -  I jump half a foot in the air, contort my face in shock and try to suppress a squeal. I then spend about 3 mins trying to fish the broken elastic out of my mouth! Fun times!

I have an appointment with the orthodontist next Wednesday, I am super keen to find out what he thinks about my uneven bite and whether or not it can be fixed with enough time or if my teeth will never ever meet again on the left hand side of my jaw! Stay tuned for the next enthralling installment!

Ps - 12 weeks - is that 3 months? Or is 3 months 90 days??? I don't know so just in case here is a recap of my side profile. 

1) Pre-surgery 

2) 5 weeks post surgery and  

3) Today (12 weeks)

 

Day 77: Eleven Weeks On....

Left Jaw Pain 0/10     

Right Jaw Pain: 0/10    

Hip Pain: 0/10

Inconvenience factor: 5/10

Week 11 already?!?!?! "But what happened to Week 10 Young Lady" I hear you ask!?
If I am honest, last week I was thoroughly fed up! Supremely frustrated, annoyed, down in the dumps, grumpy bearing and absolutely not in the right frame of mind for blogging anything worth reading......unless you like self indulged, whiny emo-ness! 

My wallowing centred on my uneven bottom jaw and the resultant ineffectual chewing I am still plagued by, my continued inability to bite, the numbness, the aching teeth, the ulcers, the constant pins and needles in my face, the stupid bits of bone in my cheeks that refuse to flatten - all of which I had assumed would be back to normal by now. On top of that my inability to run and the dissolution of my previously great fitness base continues to plague me - how am I going to train for and run an Ultramarathon in 2013, if I can't even jog for 20mins at Grandpa pace? (All this leads to the inconvenience factor of 5! I'm definitely ready for life to be approaching normal again!)

So esssentially, you know, all the same old crap I've been banging on about for weeks now and you're probably sick to death of hearing!....Oh...AND on top of all that my goldfish got sick and died! Poor Miss Maggie! :(

And then there is the small matter of my newly acquired wonky smile that I noticed for the first time last week! I freaked out a little bit and since then I have become completely paranoid about smiling. What am I on about? Check this photo out:

>THIS< is what happens when I don't concentrate on smiling and just smile!!!!!!!!

I used to have a fantastic smile....
Now I have that twisted mess up there.....HONESTLY WHAT IS THAT?
It looks like a cross between a grimace and a really bad Groucho Marx impression.

So now, to smile with some sort of symmetry, I have to concentrate really hard and consciously 'pull' down the right side of my lip!
Hard work and annoying! 

This may go part way to explaining my grumpy moods. You don't have to smile when you are grumpy! Life is easier for me this way! :)

A few people have asked me in the past 2 weeks whether it has all been worth it? After some serious pondering of this question, I would have to say, at this point of my recovery....my answer is no, it has not been worth it!!!

Not yet anyway. Hopefully, in time, it will be (please let that be true). But at the moment, I am no better off, in fact I am worse off in terms of my ability to eat, which was, after all, the whole point! Plus, there is the plethora of other things that have and do compromise my quality of life and all the little things yet to resolve themselves that bug me everyday. So, ask me again in a month and hopefully I can answer differently! 
 
One step in the right direction at least this week, was that I managed to complete a slow 20 min jog without stopping or needing medical attention at the end of it! Hooray! There is hope!!!!

Day 63: Nine Weeks On....

Left Jaw Pain 0/10     

Right Jaw Pain: 0/10    

Hip Pain: 1/10

Inconvenience factor: 4/10

Nine weeks in AND a New Year! I figured today was the day to try running again! 

63 days without donning my old faithfuls to hit the trails seems unbelievable.... the withdrawal symptoms have definitely kicked in......I am ready, I have been thinking about this all week - I am finally consuming enough calories, I have my energy and bounce back, and I hardly notice my hip when walking any more. Surely I am ready for a wee jog?!?!? Just 20 to 30 minutes along the beach to the jetty and back! Should be a piece of cake!

The alarm goes off at 6:45am, I pull on my running gear, lace up my shoes and step out in the crisp morning. I return to the house to grab another layer of clothes, mentally check myself and try again! My first few paces are tentative and slow, not sure how the hip is going to go - all is good and I ease into my stride - across the park, over the road, up the hill, down to the beach all smiles and buzzing in the joy of an old friend. I set my sights on the jetty in the distance, locking in a 4.5km circuit. I can do this!!! 

 About 8 mins into the run my hip sends me a quick memo.....I momentarily wonder if I should stop and walk for a bit......Nah! That hardly hurts at all. I know what pain is and that ain't even a 1 on the chart yet! Jetty here I come! You are all probably shaking your heads at me right now but let me tell you it was not my hip that was my undoing....

It seems that every part of my body that missed out on the pity party of the past 9 weeks has decided to have has something to say to me!  2 minutes after the hip twinge, my knees started playing up, then a toe and then my guts cramped like nobody's business to the point it took my breathe away. That pulled me up short! What now? I'm only 10mins in this run, I can't stop now - I refuse to walk!!! But I'm not insane, I aborted the jetty dream, mapped out a shortcut and took 8 mins to run home in the most awkward half crunched over gait you've ever seen. 

Recovery from the guts attack was not swift. It was not pretty. It involved a 'bathroom break', followed by lying on cold tiles and then sitting under a cold shower. Eventually, I came good and managed to limp my way to work. By the end of the day my leg muscles were already stiff and sore - I find this hard to comprehend! I only ran for 18 mins. PATHETHIC!! Have I really lost every scrap of my fitness? It would appear that 9 weeks of being sedentary has sent me right back to the beginning like that dreaded serpent at Number 99 on the snakes and ladders board. Arrgh!!!

My week of chewing has been interesting. My teeth don't line up at all well at the moment, I think this is because the muscles on the left side of my face have loosened, where as the right side muscles are still spme what stiff and tight and create distinct resistance to my jaw opening. This all results in a very uneven biting mechanism and the teeth on my left side never actually meeting. To make matters worse, I keep biting on my numb lip. So, whilst I persist in it, chewing is rather slow and awkward and is definitely not a pretty sight for the beholder! 

The left side of my numb lip and chin has been tingling pins and needles permanently for a number of days now. Whilst, I'm taking this as a great sign for nerve recovery (hopefully), it is also HIGHLY IRRITATING and can be quite distracting. It's like some crazy white noise for your touch sense! 

However, if it means I will get sensation back there again, I will take it for as long as I have to!!!!! Unfortunately, the right side of my bottom lip and chin still has no sensation whatsoever! I may just have to come to terms with it never coming back?!?!?! Argh!

Day 56: Eight Weeks on...

Left Jaw Pain 0/10     

Right Jaw Pain: 0/10    

Hip Pain: 1/10

Inconvenience factor: 2/10

Hipbone bits in my cheek 0/10 

It's been a GREAT week! I finally have progress in my ability to chew! I have been testing it out every day - usually with painful feedback which stops further attempts. But yesterday, my mouth opened noticeably wider than ever before (well at least since surgery - Check out the gapping gob below).

I also realised that yawning did not hurt anymore - I could feel the muscles working but they didn't hurt! So, it was with great excitement that I undertook my daily chewing experiment: A small spoonful of soggy weetbix....yes okay, not the most formidable of opponents but you have to start somewhere. For the first time in 8 weeks, I was victorious! You have no idea how amazing that feeling was!!!

So I figured it was time to explore my chewability with some more challenging foods!!!

Round 2 -  Morning tea scones with jam and cream - Cut up into tiny pieces - somewhat awkward and not very effective chewing of 3 pieces of scone but no pain and no inner cheek chomping either - thank goodness!

Round 3 - Spinach and fetta pasty roll - again something super soft and cut into tiny pieces but was chomped on 6 pieces with great success and in a slightly more coordinated manner!

Round 4 - A pile of Smarties - Suck them a little bit and gently crush between the teeth - left side was sweet, the right side of my jaw did not want to play ball and hurt so I quit but it's good to find my new limits.

I am so excited to be well and truly back on the road to chewing. It's slow and awkward but it's CHEWING!!!!!! Woo Hoo!!! 

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!