Day 5: Dealing with Life at Koala Speed.

Left Jaw Pain: 1/10

Right Jaw Pain: 6/10

Hip Pain: 3/10

Inconvenience factor: 8/10

Have you ever sat back enthralled watching a koala go about it's day? Quite honestly, I can't imagine that you have. They are terribly slow and boring and remain completely motionless for 16-18 hours every day. 

Sure every now and again, one will open it's eye, maybe to scratch an itch, maybe to rearrange its position in the branches so that you'll stop staring at it and then the eyes close and the koala sleeps again. Maybe you've been lucky enough to catch it in a rare moment of lucidity between fermented gum leaf stupours. It's still not stellar viewing, watching it tediously devour a dozen leaves, or even amble up another branch before well, you know it, it nods back off to sleep.

Time for a life readjustment.Previously I was an ant on the Get up and Go scale, now I am the epitome of that koala. Sleep; drug stupor, eat; sleep; rearrange position; drug stupor; eat; sleep. Repeat. 

This morning it took me 45 minutes to consume my breakfast. A huge breakfast consisting of:

• 1/6 cup of porridge with enough milk added to turn it into porridge soup
• 30ml prune juice (sage advice from www.doublejawsurgery.com blog which will be well heeded)
• 150ml  cup of pineapple juice
• 1x 250ml Chocolate Up & Go (with 60% more protein).

I was actually pretty pleased with this. Compared to what I have been managing to get down my throat this was enormous! So huge in fact, that it wiped me out physically with the effort. Soon after mouth rinsing (no cleaning teeth for this poor sucker) I had to take myself off to bed. A two hour snooze sorted me out!

Why is eating so hard?

1. My entire bottom lip and the skin down to my chin tip are numb. This makes it not only hilarious to watch me eat, as food unbeknown to me dribbles down my face and eventually splashes into my lap. But it also means that I can not use a straw. It is impossible to create a seal for effective suction with no control over your lip. So all liquids go into my mouth via a syringe!  
2. The interior of my mouth is rather swollen and my teeth are held closed with elastic bands. I may remove the elastic band on one side (the left) to get a bit of an opening for eating. It is a very small hole and only the tip of  teaspoon can fit in (make sure the bottom of the spoon is wiped clean or it will end up on your shirt). Prior to today, even after getting any solid food into my mouth - all I wanted to do was gag. There is lots of gunk up my nose still and not being able to breathe or open your mouth for a quick intake of air should you need it creates a bit of panic. Today with my watery porridge I overcame this fear! 

 Well....that's it from the koala - I should really go and eat something but just the thought of the effort required is making me tired. Maybe I will go nap first. :)