A New Date - Start the Countdown Clock Again!

So here I am four days later with a new surgery date.....Thursday 8th of November.

It's been quite the mix of emotions processing that information but that is a story for another day!


Pros: 
1) It's infinitely better than the 20th December option I was first offered! I can't quite imagine Christmas through a straw!
2) It's soon. I know that I want this behind me now!

Cons:
1) I will miss my close cousin's wedding on the 10th November - can't do that reading now can I?! I guess I can try to Skype in from hospital! That should be interesting!
2) My best friend who was going to sit in the waiting room with me on the morning of surgery will be interstate on holidays.   :(

Four more weeks of stress. Four more weeks to get ready! Let the Games begin! 

Cancellation

DISASTER!!!

 Shortly after lunch....the phone rings....."Sonja, it's CranioFacial for you on line 2".

"Hi Sonja. I'm really sorry but unfortunately....." 

No conversation beginning like that is going to end well now is it? 

Three trauma cases need the theatre on Thursday so I've been bumped - and rightly so.....these guys need help now....I have 20 years.

However much I can rationalise the greater need....the emotional punch is hard to ignore.

Being slightly emotionally inept I find it difficult at the best of times to describe how I am feeling.  This feeling is impossibly difficult to articulate, but I will try....

Shell shocked, hollow, punched in the guts, sick, numb, and empty all mixed into one!

The question I was asking earlier today - Do I really want this to happen?!?!??!

Now that it's been taken away - I know the answer is a definitive YES!!!

So what now? 
We'll call you Wednesday with a new date.....

But it's only Monday......so until then - I get to live in limboland!?!?
Don't plan anything..... 
You can imagine how that went down!

:(

T-3: Focus damn it - FOCUS!!!

With only 3 days until I go under, concentrating at work is proving to be rather difficult! Maybe I should have taken these few days off? Tomorrow at the very  least? 

My mind keeps wandering......What soups to make? How much will fit into my freezer? What do I pack for hospital? Should I bring a book or is that just stupid? Should I be writing a Will? What should I have as my last swan song meal?

I started writing a mental list of questions for the surgeon....Will my eyes be puffed shut? How long until it's safe for young children to visit me and not be traumatised by my fat swollen face? How big is the scar on my hip going to be? How long until I can drive? How long until I can fly in a plane? Do I have to sleep sitting up? Will my jaws be wired shut with wire or elastics?

How is it possible I haven't thought of these things sooner?  - I have interrogated him so extensively already - the ins and outs of the procedure but clearly not the recovery implications. I wonder if he'll write me a schedule?

Do I really want to go through with this? Is it too late to change my mind?

This is NOT helping my nerves.... Best go and savour chewing my lunch!

T-5 : The Great Diversion - The Face Off Party

I am decidedly dreading surgery and a number of my close friends know this well. 

A few months ago a brilliant plan was hatched....Throw a party so that I would have something to focus on, something to get excited about and could also use it as an excuse to gather all the people closest to me in one place from some last minute morale support.

Now when I say party, this was not just any old party.....This was a Face Off party!!!

Purely designed to Poke a LOT of fun!

For starters, entry was by donation of liquid sustenance or a form of entertainment (books, crosswords, DVD etc). 

A 3 course liquid dinner was served to create empathy amoungst my friends - this sorts out your adventurous friends from the rest of the pack (yes John your lack of adventure will forever be ridiculed)!

Entree: Pumpkin soup Or Carrot and Ginger soup

Main: Liquid pizza with liquidfied garlic bread followed by liquid baked potato...mmmm!!!

Dessert: A Dutch tradition in my family - Vlaflip  

A number of hilarious games were played: 

1) Pin the jaw on Sonja - an A2 print out of my head was a bit overwhelming but at least now I can see why I need my jaw corrected.

2) Flip book - You decide the new look for the surgeon.

 

3) Nip and Tuck - How many pegs can you and your team mate attach to their face in 30 seconds.

4) Eat the donut off the string with no hands (whilst wearing vampire teeth).

It was a truly fabulous night!!

A huge thank you to all my amazing friends! 

To Set the Scene.

I am going to have my face remodeled on the 11th of October, 2012*.
* This date was cancelled and surgery was rescheduled for 8th November, 2012.

To be honest, I am not looking forward to it. 

To be frank, I am scared! 

I am taking my perfectly healthy body and deliberately putting it through trauma.Why?

Because I wish to eat solid food when I am 60 and not suffer from a jaw with a cranky attitude. Surgery is the only way to ensure normal painless jaw function later in life. I really have little concern for the cosmetic 'improvements' that will come as an aside (I didn't know that my face was so asymmetrical) and am not too bothered about the other minor things this procedure will correct. Although from reading other double jaw surgery blogs there appears to be great wonder and amazement at finally being able to chew normally......I am looking forward to knowing what that will feel like!

But as much as I fear it, I want the surgery done. I want to be getting on with getting better....not sitting around waiting and worrying about what is to come. Surrender to the Process and move on.

The Process as I understand it:

• Jab me in the arm - I fall asleep.
• Stretch lips wider than humanly possible, cut and move top jaw forward (add some hip bone for padding), cut and trim bottom jaw and move backwards, stitch mouth all back up.... An easy 4-5 hour operation! No worries!
• I wake up somewhat puffy and numb, spend the night with the lovely nurses in ICU.
• Hang about in hospital for 3-4 days (I wonder if liquid hospital food is better than the standard fare?).
• I am then relegated to my home and on a liquid diet for 2 weeks. How will I not go insane? 
• I progress to soft food.
• By the end of week 3 I may be looking to return to work, about the time that my hip bone graft pain stops.
• A few more weeks of soft food, and fingers crossed I'm good to chow down whatever I want at Christmas. Yay!!!
• By 12 weeks all the swelling should be gone, my face proportions will be assessed and I will probably have day surgery to finish sorting out my chin.

I keep busy. Life is for living and the prospect of sitting at home for 2-3 weeks doing, well, nothing is really daunting for me. Those of you that know me well are probably chuckling to yourselves at the seeming impossibility of that task!

So there you have it, this blog is one of the ways I intended to keep me from going insane and hopefully entertains a few of you along the way! :)